[休闲娱乐]谐趣英文--陆续更新(转载)

楼主:wiwi04 时间:2004-12-03 14:45:00 点击:496 回复:9
脱水 打赏 看楼主 设置

字体:

边距:

背景:

还原:

1.Husband:I am going to discharge our chauffeur.
   four times recently he almost killed me.
   Wife: Darling,give him another chance.
  
  丈夫:我要解雇我们的司机,最近有四次他差点害死我
  妻子:亲爱的,再给他一次机会。
  
  2. Counsel: Miss ,what is your age?
   Witness: I am over twenty.
   Counsel: You must be more explicit.
   Witness: Well ,I am between twenty and thirty.
   Counsel : No more trifling. State your exact age.
   Witness: I’ll be thirty the day after tomorrow.
  
  律师:小姐,你几岁?
  证人:我过了20 岁了
  律师:你必须说得更准确点
  证人:嗯,在20 和30 之间
  律师:别再浪费时间了,说出你的确实年龄。
  证人:后天我就要30岁了。
  
  3. Parson (to his wift):Well ,my dear, I do wish I could
   think of some way to make the
   congregation keep their eyes on me
   during the sermon.
   son: Put the clock right behind the pulpit.
  
  牧师(对他的太太):嗯,亲爱的,真希望能想出个办法,使听众在听
   我布道时眼睛都能注意到我这边来。
  儿子: 把钟放在讲坛的后面。
  
  4.Professor: What happens to gold when it is exposed to the
   air?
   student(after reflection ) : It’s stolen.
  
  教授:黄金暴露无遗在空气中会如何?
  学生(思考以后):被偷
  
  5. Doctor : You’re coughing easier this morning.
   Patient: I should . I practiced all night.
  
  医生:你今天早上咳得轻松多了。
  病人:应该的。我练习了整个晚上。
  
  6.A man with two badly burned ears went to see his doctor.
   “What happened?“ asked the doctor.
   “Well,“ began the man,“my wife was ironing while I was watching the ball game on TV.She put the hot iron near the telephone and when the phone rang, I answered the iron.“
   The doctor nodded.“But what happened to the other ear?“
   “No sooner had I hung up,“said the man ,“than the same guy called up again!“
  
  一个两耳朵被严重灼伤的人去找他的医生。
  ”怎么啦?“医生问。
  ”嗯,” 那人开始说,“我在看电视球赛时,我太太正在用熨斗烫衣服。电话响时,她的熨斗就放在电话旁边,我拿起熨斗回话。
  医生点点头,“可是另一只耳朵是怎么回事?”
   “我刚挂断电话,同样那人又打来了!”
  
  7.The pen is mightier than the sword,“ said the poet to his Jewish friend.
  “ Of course it is ,“ said the Jew. “You can’t sign checks with a sword.“
  
  “笔诛胜于剑伐,“ 诗人对他的犹太朋友说。
  “当然是,“ 犹太人说,“你无法用剑签支票。“
  -------The pen is mightier than the sword.
   [谚]笔诛胜于剑伐;文胜于武
  
  8. Girl:While I was going downtown on the tramcar this
   morning, the conductor came along and looked at me
   as if I had not paid my fare.
   Friend: Well ,what did you do?
   Girl: I looked at him as if I had.
  
  女孩:今天早上我坐电车到市中心时,售票员走过来并注视着我,
   就好象我没付车钱一样。
  朋友:嗯,那你怎么办呢当时?
  女孩: 我也注视着他,就好象我付了钱那一样。
  
  9. Author : You can’t appreciate it.You never wrote a book
   yourself.
   Friends: No,and I never laid an egg, but I’m a better
   judge of an omelet than any hen in this country.
  
  作者: 你无法欣赏它,你自己从未写过书。
  朋友: 没写过,我也从没下过蛋,但是我却比这个国家的任何一只
   母鸡更擅长鉴定煎蛋卷。
  10. Custome: What’s the meaning of this fly in my soup?
   Waiter: I don’t know,sir. I’m a waiter,not a
   fortune -teller.
  
  顾客:这只苍蝇在我的汤里是什么意思?
  服务员:先生,我不知道,我是个服务员,不是算命的。
  
  
  
  
  
  

打赏

0 点赞

主帖获得的天涯分:0
举报 | | 楼主 | 埋红包
楼主发言:1次 发图:0张 | 添加到话题 |
作者:十三日de爱 时间:2004-12-04 14:00:11
  good,upholding .
作者:谷米子 时间:2004-12-04 15:21:05
  remind me of teenage days :)
楼主wiwi04 时间:2004-12-08 09:23:19
  A man and a boy were walking along a quiet street when the former bent down and picked up a glove lying in the load.
  
  "There‘s nothing like honesty,my son," he remarked, as he placed the glove beside some railings.
  
  A hundred yards farther on they encountered a second glove.
  
  "Goodness me!" exclaimed the man, as he picked it up and tried it on: "If this isn‘t the mate of first one-and just my fit. Hurry back,Jimmy, and fetch the other."
  
  
  一个男人和他的一个小男孩走在一条安静的街道 上,前者弯下腰捡起了一只丢在路旁的手套。
  
  “诚实是最重要的,我的孩子,”当他把手套放在栏杆旁时说道。
  
   往前约100码远的地方,他们看到了第二只手套。
  “天那!那男人把它捡起来 戴在手上,大叫道 :”不知道这是不是第一只手套的另一只--正合我的手。快回去,吉米,去拿另一只来。
楼主wiwi04 时间:2004-12-08 09:31:10
  “For heaven‘s sake,stop asking so many questions,Margaret,"
   cried Mother. "Curiosity killed the cat."
  
   After theree minutes of meditation, little Maggie asked,"What did the cat want to know?
  
  “看在老天爷的份上,别再问那么多问题了,玛格丽特,”母亲叫着,好奇会整死一只猫的。“
  
   沉思了3分钟以后,小玛格问:”那只猫想知道什么?“
  
  ..传说猫有9条命,而人只有1 条命。好奇能杀死猫,更何况人:)
楼主wiwi04 时间:2004-12-08 09:37:12
  After" theree" minutes
  
  
  是 three
楼主wiwi04 时间:2004-12-08 09:55:18
  The old woman in the oxygen tent fondly told her nephew that all her wealth,stocks,bonds,bank account and real estate would be his after the end finally came.
  
  "Oh ,Aunt Mary," whispered the weeping nephew, his voice emotion-choked,"I can‘t tell you how grateful I am... how unworthy I am ...Is there ...anything I can do for you ? Anything at all?"
  
   "Well, my boy ," came the feeble reply, "I‘d appreciate it very much if you took your foot off the oxygen hose."
  
  戴着氧气罩的老太太怜爱地告诉她的侄子,在她死后,她所有的财产,股票,债券,银行账户和不动产等,都是他的。
  
  “哦,到丽婶婶,"流着泪的侄子轻声地说,他的声音充满了感情,“我说不出我有多感激....我是多么不配得到...有没有......任何事情我能为您做的?到底有没有什么事呢?
  
  “嗯,我的孩子,”微弱的声音回答说,“如果你把你踩在氧气管上的脚移开,我会非常感激的。”
作者:幽默未遂 时间:2004-12-08 12:29:25
  Humor is mightier than the sword, too.
作者:岂若 时间:2005-01-22 22:32:55
  哈哈
作者:Fragreen 时间:2005-01-22 22:37:18
  打印出来,上厕所的时候好好研究一下

相关推荐

换一换

      本版热帖

        发表回复

        请遵守天涯社区公约言论规则,不得违反国家法律法规